why change?

it was an unnerving thought. for the fourth year in a row, she was looking at the reality of being in a different church building come her birthday. after years of having the security of actually belonging somewhere, the last four years of her life had been a bit unsettling, not knowing what was next or why all this was happening.

this time, she knew ahead of time. yet it didn't really hit her till the announcement was made. then, the tears fell and she felt so alone. what was going to happen? how could things get better? what did the future hold? life had definitely brought lots of changes in the past year with more prospects of change in the coming year, but this, really? why this, and why now?

she thought of the hopelessness of last year. how God intervened and given her some special friends. ones who loved her and encouraged her for who she was and were very special souls themselves. and she wouldn't have met these dear friends without experiencing a new birthday with new faces and a new church. thankfully, she knew she'd still have these friends no matter what different directions they may go.

it was hard to come to a conclusion, because there were no facts other than the fact that she had to move on. she wanted to talk to somebody, but the people to talk to these days seemed to get fewer and fewer. after all, it gets tiring after awhile having everyone jump to conclusions about your life or decisions when all you want is for someone to hold you, listen to you and keep believing when your faith is a bit shaken.

again, she was faced with changes in life, and she wanted to resist so badly, but what would the resisting do? if it couldn't revert reality, what was the use? so, it seemed that it would be okay to shed a few tears and then remember "life is hard, but God is good." after all, this is what had gotten her through past times. for even in this, God had promised that all things would work together. redemption should be on the horizon soon.